how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize