She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
