I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize