i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
