i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize