Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
