Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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