I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
