Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
