She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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