The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
