how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
