Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
