Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize