He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize