I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
