I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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