I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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