if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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