my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize