I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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