that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
