WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
