Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
two words...techno handjob
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize