yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize