i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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