i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
