just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just invented taco cereal.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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