At least make sure they are 18
Why
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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