I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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