used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
