Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
