Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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