She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
