I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Randomize
