She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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