i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize