Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
