Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
