I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
