did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
