I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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