JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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