well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
