Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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