Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
