What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
