Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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