Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
