You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
