Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
