I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
